When you young and get married, you really don’t know what you are getting into. Combined finances, integrated families, building your own family and traditions. I think in the first marriage, I’ve never heard anyone complain (at first at least) about “personal relations”, if you would like me to explain that a little better, please e-mail me. I didn’t complain my first marriage. It slowed down, we were busy, but relations still occurred.
When I became a widow, the very LAST thing on my mind was “relations”. I was fine and dandy trying to figure out how to take care of my daughter and myself. It was hard, very hard at first, we figured it out together though. I became lonely after about three years. I became tired of Nick JR TV. Please think about this, I was a widow at forty two. I needed some adult time. I made several rules for myself. I was always home by ten PM. I only dated a man that I thought I MIGHT want to introduce to my daughter. I ended up dating three men (not at the same time,lol). She met two of the men.
The second one, the children just did not get along. That was a NO for me. While I was dating the third man, my home of twenty years burned. I was devastated. He stepped in and helped me with everything. I thought he was my Prince Charming. I liked him before but I loved him after he helped me through all he helped me through. He was good with my daughter, he teased with her. She liked that type of stuff. I see now how he fooled me.
We had a NORMAL relationship at first when it came to “relations”. We have been married since April 2015. He has slept on the couch (saying he just falls asleep watching tv) for about a year. I haven’t had relations in about a year. I’ve asked him directly for relations. I’ve made move towards “relations”. Nothing has worked. I know, in my heart, what this means. I’m a Southern Baptist girt who doesn’t believe in divorce though. I’ve gained 40 pounds, eating away my feelings. I’m good at that!
He’s taken himself off the cloud on our phones, he isn’t at work when I just show up and says he is buying “something”. He was off two extra two days last week and three this week, all while my daughter is at school. “Relations” wouldn’t be a problem at all during the daytime while she’s gone.
Please try not to judge people, you NEVER know what pain they might be going through.